Do Not Pass Go... Do Not Collect $200

Another Binge...  Blah!

I am smack dab in the middle of a very nice three day weekend and while I wish I could say we went somewhere extravagant like rafting down the Nile river or something, the break away from work was good enough for me. 

Unfortunately, being away from work also takes me away from my routine.  I usually make the effort to walk during my breaks and lunch at work racking up my 10,000 plus steps before I even get into my truck to drive home.   THIS DID NOT HAPPEN!

I cannot entirely blame the 3 day weekend for my indiscretions.  Plural.  It started earlier this week.  Those damn Valentines Day Cup Cakes at work.  And because the first one didn't send me into sugar europhia, I did what any normal human being would do in my situation.  That's right...  I licked the frosting off a second one.  And remained completely unashamed in doing so.  

And so the story begins....

By this morning I had eaten myself into oblivion.  Seriously...  If it was eatable.  I ate it.  

Now I would never blame my weight or eating habits on anyone but myself. And I'd like to think I usually eat pretty healthy, but my husband eats whatever he wants.  And I must confess there are days (the last 4 for instance) where I wish I could do the same thing and not gain an ounce.  I must have assumed this to be true because during my binge I found myself consuming things like a wood chipper.  Shoving things like donuts and toast slathered in Nutella into my mouth as fast as my teeth could turn them into pulp. 

When the entire package of Mega Stuffed Oreos went missing in the night, my husband either did not notice, or kindly pretended he didn't.  I think maybe he thinks this is something that women just do.  Occasionally plunging head first into a giant bag of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, turning them into a tornado of chocolate wrappers, like in the Cathy comics.  

Now... Immediately following a binge  I am filled with a great deal of guilt over what I have just done to my body. What I have done to sabotage everything I have worked so hard all week to accomplish. And also because there are starving people in the world and I can't resist this horrendous compulsion to shove spoonfuls of Mac n Cheese into my face so quickly I can't even taste it. And I wasn't even hungry.  

I fantasize about living in a place where all my food choices are made for me...

Like Jail!